So I had a dream. It was probably the most entertaining dream I've had in a long while.

I just need to note that nothing is what it seems, okay. Okay?

My dream begins long before my first memorable moment. Simon Baker and I are filming a movie reminiscent of some 70's James Bond-like film that stars Robert Redford. Simon taking the place of Robert Redford even though this is certainly NOT a remake... just... similar. I dunno.

The movie is quite, um, sexy. After filming a particularly steamy scene (trust me, the body can get quite confused), despite the stop and go and ups and downs of the "moment", Simon and I were in dire needs of cold showers. He, in my dream, is known to be quite the womanizer. Myself, my persona is as I am, much committed in a monogamous relationship to the same man for ages upon ages.

Before heading off to our respective rooms in the hotel, Simon puts a bit of the charm on and suggests we cool off together. [insert porn music here] I refuse, politely and coquettishly as I do. Somehow my hotel suite is shared with my brother-in-law. In hindsight, I think I hired him as my body guard. *shrugs* Whatever. B and I discussed the similarities of my character's relationship with Simon in the movie is mirroring real-life with his current lover and yadda yadda yadda. Until I had a knock on my door.

I couldn't tell you what transpired here, but B was kicked out of the suite and Simon and I were locked in quite the, ah, embrace. To save you all from the details (don't groan), I can tell you that this became a regular occurrence between Simon and I throughout the filming of the movie. To me, it was just sex. Simple as that. A human response. To him- little did I know- he subconsciously really enjoyed my company and wanted to spend every waking moment in passion's embrace with me.

Heh heh heh. I'z awesum.

Soon, B was given Simon's suite because, well, Simon pretty much wanted to serve me hand and foot- breakfast, more specifically. I remember his amazing techniques with pancake flipping!

One day, after a particularly emotional scene, Simon confessed to me that he feels utterly guilty for trying to woo me away from my husband, to which I replied "think nothing of it, my heart and my body are two different things". He looked a little sad, but unscathed. His reputation, he figured correctly, had defined this relationship as a physical one.

"I have thrown out my book (his "black book *wink wink*) and I can't even watch porn anymore!" Simon was getting to be a little over-emotional at this point, nearly in a frenzy of laughing and crying. "The only time I can even think of sex- no enjoying sex, is with you. When I'm with you."

In good-old Dawna fashion, I logic it out and console him. "You are getting too deep into your character."

He shakes his head.

The dream ends.

I had a very interesting dream last night that I was revisiting in my head while having a cigarette not long before posting this. This dream was wonderfully vivid and full of detail and left me with a guilty feeling- a dream I knew that would be significant.

Significant until I realized what it means.

It is obvious, to me, what it means. Something I am not particularly proud of, a small "benefit", you could say, of a friendship that I have, has come to light in my dream. In my dream however, the benefit weighed more than the friendship and there is no way that I would like to broadcast it. Of course, I will NOT ignore the benefit because it is half the reason I wish to keep in contact with this friend.

It is a part of me of which I am not so proud, but I have to say that I have rarely had an acquaintance that I can actually use. I didn't realize it until I had the dream. What strikes me more is that I am quite willing to call her a friend and that I feel so bad to draw a benefit from the relationship.

Cool, eh?

Ya know what, though? I doubt that she minds.